27 January 2012

The 13 Steps of Labor

My Labor in 13 Steps

1. This isn't so bad.
2. Yeah, I'm rocking this out. Already 8 centimeters and no biggie with the pain.
3. Oh. Oh. Oh God. Why is she trying to escape out of my back?
4. Hey, where's the epidural I asked for?
5. Holy mother of %$^&&*&^$%##. WTF?
6. Ooooooohhhh epidural. That's nice.
7. Nothing to it baby. What contraction?
8. Wait, what do you mean you are taking my epidural away?
9. Okay, I'll just go fast before all that beautiful medicine is gone.
10. Oh. Ohhhh.. OH. OH. OH MY GOD. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? I WANT MY EPIDURAL BACK.
11. STOP TELLING ME TO HOLD MY BREATH. I NEED TO FREAKING BREATHE. HOW DO YOU THINK YOU'LL GET HER OUT IF I'M UNFREAKINGCONSCIOUS?
12. Ewwwww......
13. Wow. Would you look at that? She's awesome.



Madison Paige
7 lbs. 14 oz, 21 1/2 in

54 comments:

  1. Congrats! She's gorgeous!

    ReplyDelete
  2. OMG! Trisha, congratulations! She's beautiful!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh my gosh congratulations! She's gorgeous! And you're freakin hilarious.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Congrats! Yeah, that was funny. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. She's gorgeous! I'm so happy for you all!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ohhh she's precious!!! Congratulations!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  7. OMG OMG!!! You had her! She is gorgeous! And yes that sounds like labor. But then you forget because they are so darned perfect and you are hopelessly in love. I'm so happy for you!

    ReplyDelete
  8. CONGRATS! :) She is so beautiful!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Congratulations, Trisha! She's beautiful!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Normally I don't say this, but she actually DOES already look like you!!

    So why'd they take your epidural away? I never had one of those. They terrify me. :D

    ReplyDelete
  11. and I hit publish before I meant to - congrats!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  12. She's beautiful! Congratulations!

    ReplyDelete
  13. She's absolutely perfect. Many many many congratulations--hope you're doing well.

    and that hair! :)

    Oh...my heart

    icanwaituntiljulyicanwaituntiljulyicanwaituntiljuly

    ReplyDelete
  14. Absolutely beautiful! Congratulations. :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. I love that in the second one, she looks like she's rearing up to punch you…

    *gobbles up baby, with mustard*

    ReplyDelete
  16. She's so cute! Congrats, Trisha!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Oh my goodness! Congratulations. I was so excited to see this post in my feed. And I cannot get over how much hair she has. Job well done. :)

    ReplyDelete
  18. YAYYYYY!!!! Madison is seriously gorgeous and SO AWAKE for a newborn. Greyson was the same way. So so so so so happy for you. And this is quite possibly the best birth recap ever.

    ReplyDelete
  19. congrats!she looks ready to take on the world in that second pic!

    ~L

    ReplyDelete
  20. Oh my gosh, she's adorable! Congrats, Trisha!

    ReplyDelete
  21. Welcome to the world, Madison Paige! Congrats, Mom, she's beautiful :)

    ReplyDelete
  22. Aw, she is so cute! And look at her in her little bear hat! Congrats!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Congratulations! She is definitely gorgeous and you made it through in one piece -- which is all that you can really ask for! Enjoy these first few days with your beautiful girl. :)

    ReplyDelete
  24. Congrats! She's adorable!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Congratulations, so very sweet. Your post is hilarious but oh so true.

    Love the name - my daughter goes 5 next week and is named Paige also.

    Enjoy all the moments

    ReplyDelete
  26. She's beautiful! And judging by pic #2, she comes with a bit of attitude. :-D Congratulations!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  27. She's beautiful!! Congratulations to the entire family!

    ReplyDelete
  28. From the little I know about giving birth, this sounds like a typical process.

    It appears to have been worth it, though -- she's adorable! And I love the second photo the most. She's got a little 'tude, doesn't she?

    ReplyDelete
  29. Congrats!! She is gorgeous! Love love love the middle photo with the little hat!! You rocked it!!! I can't believe you are able to put together a sentence let alone write a hilarious post! So happy for you!!!!! Love the name!!!

    ReplyDelete
  30. She's beautiful! Love her name! Many, many congratulations!!!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Oh, she is so wonderful, and beautiful! I can't wait to see more pictures and to hear more about her! Congratulations to you on the new little one. She is just so perfect!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Congratulations! She is beautiful and her name is lovely. Glad to see you survived labor with your humor intact.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Oh wow, congratulations! She is absolutely gorgeous and adorable!

    ReplyDelete
  34. I know I said it before, but congrats again, Trisha :D She looks adorable.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Who's a cute little baby!?!? Congratulations!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Gorgeous baby and impressively short overview of the labor process. Any time I think of mine, I go right to the cursing. Congrats!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  37. Ohmygod! She is so freaking cute!!!!!! Congratulations Trisha :) awwww

    ReplyDelete
  38. I'm a bit late but congratulations!!! She is beautiful :)

    ReplyDelete
  39. Hooray! I came over today hoping to see this news. :-) Welcome Floppy Alienette aka Madison Paige!

    ReplyDelete
  40. She is absolutely adorable! Congratulations on your new baby (and wonderful description of labor). Made me giggle.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Oh she is so BEAUTIFUL!!!!! And lol to #3, man do I remember that! Congratulations!

    ReplyDelete
  42. Congratulations! She's beautiful.

    ReplyDelete
  43. How on earth did I miss this post!?! Congrats! She's beautiful :)

    ReplyDelete
  44. What a BEAUTY!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

    ReplyDelete

Talk to me baby!